Days Until I Am No Longer A 1L:

Sunday, July 24, 2005

Peace out, bitches

If you haven't been able to tell by the rate of my posts recently, my desire to blog is definitely waning. So, I'm out. I don't feel like writing anymore and to be honest I really don't even read anyone else's blog either, so it doesn't really make any sense to keep on with this. The only time I even think about this place any more is when I think to myself "man, I haven't written any thing in a while, I should put something up there." Plus, I can already tell that I am going to be incredibly busy this year at school and I don't need this hanging over my head. So, I hope you all enjoyed this little experiment while it lasted. I actually kept up with this for longer than I expected, but I don't feel like doing this anymore. Honestly, I don't think I am going to miss it. Also, I just have to add that I think it is fantastically ironic that the spellchecker on Blogger doesn't recognize the word "blog."

Later,
Jack

Saturday, July 23, 2005

I could see the squirrels, then I deep fried them

Imagine Milton from Office Space with an out of control Col. Sanders goatee - I sat across from him on the Metro yesterday. It was hard not to stare. Or laugh. He even had the huge glasses that made his eyes look enormous. I really wish I had a camera phone at the time. Or a police sketch artist.

Sunday, July 10, 2005

Pretty standard, actually

Great party last night, but one of the funniest things involved someone who wasn't even there. See, my good buddy Cruiser never showed up to the party. He wasn't there because he got lost between his place and the apartment where the party was. The funny thing about that is the fact that these two apartments are three blocks apart. I kinda had an idea that we wouldn't be seeing him based on some of the IMs I got from him right before I left. Cruiser had spent the entire day in Baltimore at the baseball game drinking much beer. Here's what he had to say, starting with right before I left, continuing through the night and then picking up again this morning. Everything is taken verbatim, including the spellings.

Cruiser (8:46:46 PM): dude, you there?
Jack (8:46:58 PM): yeah
Cruiser (8:48:29 PM): y9
Cruiser (8:48:38 PM): i;ll be at your place in 20 min
Cruiser (8:48:47 PM): proch
Jack (8:48:49 PM): my place or debs
Cruiser (8:48:52 PM): i cant find my phone
Cruiser (8:48:58 PM): is it your phace lr cebs?
Jack (8:49:04 PM): debs
Cruiser (8:49:07 PM): sih
Jack (8:49:08 PM): how drunk are you
Cruiser (8:49:09 PM): i mean
Cruiser (8:49:10 PM): ish
Cruiser (8:49:12 PM): drunk
Jack (8:49:17 PM): no kidding
Cruiser (8:49:20 PM): ish
Cruiser (8:49:42 PM): as long as people will anser my phone
Cruiser (8:49:48 PM): i just can;t phine my own phone
Cruiser is away at 8:49:54 PM.
Cruiser returned at 9:05:25 PM.
Cruiser (9:05:31 PM): gimme your phone #
Cruiser (9:05:35 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:37 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:38 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:39 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:40 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:41 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:41 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:42 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:43 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:44 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:45 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:46 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:46 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:47 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:48 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:49 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:50 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:52 PM): now
Cruiser (9:05:56 PM): yo0u cikc
Cruiser signed off at 9:06:08 PM.
Cruiser signed on at 9:14:38 AM.
Cruiser (9:14:58 AM): sorry dude - i got lost between your place and mine
Cruiser (9:15:04 AM): you think i'm just joking
Cruiser (9:15:08 AM): but no, i seriously got lost
Cruiser (9:15:16 AM): (i was kind of "housed")

I particularly like the y9 - I'm not really sure what that means.

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

America, fuck yeah!

So I just got back from watching the fireworks on the mall. Just when living in the heart of D.C, right near all the monuments and such, becomes commonplace, you walk up onto your friend's roof on the 4th of July and the Washington Monument is right in front of you and the Capitol is to your right, a handful of blocks away and lit up by floodlights. Needless to say, the view was great, as was the company. It was a great way to spend the holiday - we got to enjoy the downtown fireworks without the downtown crowds or traffic. Plus, none of the people who braved the crowds on the mall got to see Saucy Little Hat, the smallest of all of us there, freak out about falling through the roof because it felt squishy. That was almost as entertaining as the Beach Boys, who appeared to be coked out beyond belief and sounded like they hadn't performed together since the Reagan administration. Unfortunately, tomorrow it's back to the old grind. Fortunately, the boss is out of town all week.

Also, I just had three hot dogs - they were scrumtralescent.

Monday, July 04, 2005

Semper Fi

So, I went to dinner with a couple of bloggers tonight. It was a good time. Based on the way these two talk, I was kinda expecting that there would be plenty of libations enjoyed, but apparently these two can't hang. Thankfully, they had their friend E with them. He is a Lance Coproral in the Marine Corps and a flight engineer on the C-130, in addition to being a private pilot, so needless to say, we had a lot to talk about. Additionally, we decided that we weren't quite ready to call it an evening just as we were walking past Fado Irish Pub. We stopped in to grab a pint or two, and next thing we knew, it was last call. Go figure - I was at an Irish Pub until last call. Just to make things a little more interesting, about a half hour before last call, a party bus showed up with a whole group of people who were on a costume party pub crawl. It was crazy - I came back from the little boy's room to find at least four women wearing wings. There was also a guy in a chicken hat. I'm not making this up. We were complimented by a sweet young lass on our Irish names, which always makes me proud - we won't hold the fact that she was Scottish against her. Last I saw, E was climbing on the party bus, of to who knows where. Hopefully, I will get the rest of the story tomorrow.

Also, it is well past midnight here, so happy 4th of July. God Bless America, now let's go blow some shit up.

Sunday, July 03, 2005

Who would have thunk it?

Apparently, they have these places called grocery stores where you can buy food to eat for dinner that isn't chicken strips and macaroni and cheese. They even have fruits and vegetables and other things that don't make your arteries clog. What will they think of next?

Stupidest. Law. Ever.

I have heard some stupid laws in my day. You don't even have to be a law student to hear some of them - they have books full of stupid laws from all over the country. You know, things like it some backwater town in Nebraska (i.e. any town in Nebraska) it's illegal to eat an ice cream cone while walking down the street and wearing a green shirt on the third Tuesday of the month. Shit like that. But tonight, I heard what is quite possibly the stupidest law ever. You are never going to believe this. You ready for it?

In Washington D.C., our nation's capitol, it is against the law for strippers to give lap dances. Yes, you read that right. Strippers in D.C. are prohibited by law from giving lap dances.

We took Mother to the titty bar tonight to celebrate his last few weeks of freedom. A short while into the evening, we came to learn of the afore mentioned law. How absurd is that?!? I mean really, here we are in the capitol of this Great Nation, on Independence Day weekend, nonetheless, and we want to take our friend out to see some titties before he gets married. What could be more American than that? All we asked for was for a little one-on-one time with the groom, but alas, that was not possible. I mean, don't get me wrong, there were plenty of titties to be seen, but it just seemed so impersonal. We will definitely remember this for the next time we have a bachelor in search of a good time.

Despite the lap dance ban, it was a good night. There was much drunkenness (with yours truly, surprisingly, being the most sober one at the end of the night). There were many great quotes, but this was a full on guy's night and there are a number of significant others who read this blog, so they will not be posted. I'll tell you that we had to send one guy home to a girlfriend with a note - I can't wait to hear how that turned out.

Well, the sun's coming up - I guess I had better get to bed. If any of you are looking for something to do in your free time, you could take a few minutes to write to Tony Williams, the mayor of D.C., to see about changing the laws in this place so that drunk guys can get a little love from some trashy chicks in trucker hats.

Saturday, July 02, 2005

I'm not proud of this

So, apparently THL has deemed this week to be National Confess Something On Your Blog Week. This couldn't come at a better time, since there has been something that I have needed to get off my chest for a long time. It is something that I did a while ago, and I have never told anybody about this until today. It's sort of a big deal, so it is going to feel good to get this out in the open, I think. Anyway, here is my confession...

I let the dogs out.

Whew - it feels good to get that out there. Now I can go on living again.